Sunday, November 6, 2011

Things that make you go Hmmmm…

..and then want to pull your own hair out
strand by strand,
while driving through Death Valley
and listening to the Chipmunks,
and Justin Beiber, wait,
now that’s just redundant.

I am talking about our kids faulty thinking…
Crazy talk.
Crazy Lying.
Crazy Behavior.
Crazy Belief System….

Frickity, Fracity…C-ARA-ZZZZZZZYYYYY

I should know, I live in this land. The simple sentence “Seriously?...SERIOUSLY?” is now my favorite “say it in my head” saying.

Insert today. We were all buggin’ from a sibling’s birthday. Sabotage was on the Loose….
Church not being an option, croupy coughs rampant, we decided to dance anyway.

We got the kiddo’s dressed and since snow has showed it’s pretty little (unwelcomed) face, we busted out the coat box.

Everyone was suited up and headed towards the van,and Cookie decided to play the “I can’t find it game”
….you know the one where he really knows exactly what he should be doing but wants to control the situation…

“Yeah Buddy”
Deep heart felt sigh, “I can’t find my coat you gave me (three minutes ago) I guess I am going to have to wear my Buzz and Woody Sweatshirt.”

Sing Songy I sung “ Try again”….
And he did , he came out in his two year old brothers coat…..

And I smiled, and sung “Try again”….

And he came out in his Sisters pink with heart shapes all over it Fleece pullover…

NOTE: If it wasn’t sooooo DANG cold I may have just rolled with that, but it was REALLY cold outside.

At this point, Hubbie, called from the Garage “what is taking so dang long, everyone is in the car.”…
and Cookies smile widened.

I marched into the Laundry room, exactly next too his cubby, but thrown on the floor in pure sight was the coat.

I picked it up, Danced and sang and Said, “COOKIE LOOK ! I found it!!! YE-HAW, lets go!”

His face fell, he mumbled under his breath about his Buzz and Woody Jacket…but he put it on and we left…

Four Hours later, we have driven around, looked at mountains, snow, possible new cars, we drove and drove and watched movies in the car.

Kids got hungry and needed to stretch their legs, so we decided to eat at a restaurant.
So we asked to sit far away from other people (Since our kids were sick) and went in.
Ordered, ate, without very little drama…Hubs sat with the boys in a booth, I had the girls in the next one.
Afterward, Hubs took kiddies out to van, while I waited to pay the check.
Diva ran in, remembering she forgot her jacket…Tragedy averted.

We drove the 1 ½ home, everyone’s in good spirits, very little bickering…close enough to bedtime, to land home, jammie-up the shorties, brush some teeth and catapult them into dreamland.

Five minutes into “Operation Bedtime” ….Cookie comes to me with a hand covering his mouth in a enormous smile.
“Um Mommmm…”

“Yep Bud”

“Ummm, welllll, I kinda left my new Coat ($50 Costco coat) at the restaurant…on accident, so I guess (Hand now totally covering an eating crap kinda grin)…I will have to wear my Buzz and Woody Sweatshirt.”
A confident little boy puts both hands on his hips as he shrugs his shoulders in an Innocent “Oh well” gesture…

This is where the “Seriously, SERIOUSLY”…gets screamed in my head.

I had to sit in silence for a minute , grid my teeth, and try NOT to lose it…and also NOT play into the game, and also NOT let him think the B.S. he just pulled and the fact that he left a perfectly GOOD, WARM coat in a freaking Chili’s 1 ½ hours away….didn’t bother me.

I was not successful.
Like Epic Failure.
I yelled, and put my hands up in the air…and was MAD.

Then I sent him to bed…..

Later (like 10 minutes, I pulled my own stuff together) realizing a Coat, wasn’t as important as he is…and went to do some repairs. The natural thing is, he doesn’t have a coat anymore. The Buzz and Woody Sweatshirt, will not last him long in this weather.
He most likely will need to earn the money to buy a new Coat,what a bummer.

My calm question, was answered
(my favorite it thing to ask my kids in retrospect, so they have the power and control to analyze their behavior, and the outcome of their choices made.”

”Did this work for you.”

“No Mom, it didn’t…now I don’t have a warm coat.”

Did you think Mommy was being mean to you by having you wear the warm coat?”

“Yes, I left and lost my new one, because I was mad at you for not letting me wear Buzz and Woody.”

"Did it work for you?”


Still, we don’t have a coat, and still I want to pull my hair out….


  1. Did you call the restaurant? Are you going by there again soon?

    That stuff drives me NUTS! We had a similar situation with glasses. ICK!

    Way to do repair.



  2. I'm a lot meaner. I probably would have let him wear the darned sweatshirt in the first place and reep what he sowed. Oh, the 'LOOKS" I've gotten over the years for this very thing! Daughter in the snow in flip-flops - you know..... But, I actually read somewhere that it is a myth that people get sick from being chilled, so I figure that if there is not really a chance of FROSTBITE what the heck!

    The restaurant will send the coat, but it will probably be cheaper to drive back and get it.

    I find it surprising that YOUR husband would EVER bother to wonder why you weren't getting into the car. (When I think how hard it is to get FOUR in!) But, then I imagine he was just managing to KEEP the ones he had!

  3. UGH!!!

    It's these little control battles that become the most infuriating!

    Deep Breaths, deep breaths :)

  4. Wow, this happened with mine with brand new glasses that he picked out. I thought he looked great in them. They were very stylish and nice, and I justified spending more on them because they last such a long time, and it's important to feel like you look good. He threw them away in the parking lot of the Emergency Room when he ran away after going in for being suicidal. I searched for days and never found them. Later he told me he picked the ones he hated the very most of any in the store. He threw them away because he hated them. I made him pay for them out of the money his grandma had given him for Christmas.

    Then his next pair, he kept falling asleep with on his head, then rolling over and bending them. The store would bend them back, but he said he still felt they were crooked and was ashamed to wear them in public. Then he wore them in the shower and one lens popped out and he couldn't find it again. It disappeared from the shower somehow. So that was the end of that pair.

    Then while I'm saving up for a new pair he complains resentfully about how I don't care about him enough to get him glasses to wear. He has contacts but forgets and wears them to sleep often until his eyes get infected.

    He's 23 now but still suffers from so many difficulties. I wish I knew how to get him more help. He has a regular therapist and psychiatrist. But nobody is addressing the attachment disorder specifically.